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This was one heck of a merge!
This PR is obviously based on @SamKosky's totally awesome work with #46. Where possible, I've prioritized PRs that have merged since it was written over the contents of #46 that did the same thing
There's probably a significant amount of cruft left over (duplicated/vestigial methods and macros, especially). If you notice any in your review, please shout.
I basically can't rebase this, I'm sorry about that. Getting a merge to behave was hard enough!
There might be test failures, I didn't get spark-http running locally.